Thoughts & Sharing

Thanks to Darryn Epp for some great photos we've borrowed!
Obviously to those who get it, and hopefully those who don't will consider it: this isn't about me, me, me - this is meant as a consider it and hopefully apply it to an opportunity yourself kind of post...

My first memory of the wee alpine lake that we fished last weekend was a one day, bang-out-the-fish trip. There are numbers in my head from my earlier days of fly fishing and that day was one: 221 cutthroat trout landed of the 400 that had been stocked 2 years earlier. A pretty good day. I was on the hunt, a fish predator, and I worked fast and furious. I wanted to catch as many fish as possible. I wanted what I wanted and had there been anyone else at the lake I would have been selfishly disappointed to some degree - I always wanted to have the best fishing possible every time I went out and tried to think ahead of where others wouldn’t be fishing. I never ran into anyone in the <maybe> dozen times I fished it, until the last visit. I was 27 my last visit.

I,  I,  I... uggh.

I hadn’t visited that lake in a decade until this past weekend. I stopped fishing it because the people I ran into the last visit were hikers that bemoaned the fact that trout had been stocked. The lake had been quietly used for decades as an out of the way, beautiful hiking destination. They were bang on right about the impacts of fishermen. 1/2 the perimeter of the lake is mossy and anglers (myself included) shamelessly and carelessly toured laps around this 200meter diameter bowl while fishing. I wish I had taken photos because the moss was trashed by boots. Further, anglers were now camping and cutting down trees and leaving garbage. Things got so bad that an outhouse had to be erected. Too many people. Considering that trees grow painfully slowly and moss recovers from insult in ice age time frames, I simply abandoned my then favorite alpine lake.

This past weekend Amelia & I decided to do something completely different and returned to the lake. Shockingly, there were a dozen vehicles at the trail head. That morning Amelia had commented that maybe if there were more than 4 cars we wouldn’t go. Well, there were. Our fly fising isn’t about competing with anyone else for fish, nor about worrying about anything external. It is simply about enjoying our time and whatever happens, wonderful! As it turned out – many wonderful things did happen. First, on the hike up, we ran into an old friend of Amelia’s and chatted for 15 min, catching up on things from our first 2 1/2 years of marriage when we were caretakers at Pioneer Ranch Camp on Crimson Lake. As we continued our hike we came across a family with 2 boys that had never been to the lake. We gave them directions and told them it was worth the hike. Sure, it’s straight up at times, but worth the hike. We continued on. When we arrived at the lake, there were a lot of people. Kind of a shock given how we were used to things, but it was the first gorgeous weather of the summer and a summer weekend, so it was busy. As we came to the lake, I heard a fellow call to his gorgeous male yellow lab, “Rocky!” I heard the words and replied,”Is that Rocky from Facebook?” I had never met Darryn but for Facebook and yet we recognized each other. It was good to meet face to face. We tossed sticks into the lake for Rocky – a very happy pup that loves the water.

Amelia & I decided to string up the rods as there were fish rising. It was kind of funny because they kept cruising the shoreline despite Rocky’s energetic swimming. It wasn't affecting anything. When my rod was together, the family of 4 from the trail arrived in time to watch me catch fish on 3 or 4 consecutive casts to start my day. I could tell the boys were curious, though had never fly fished before. Amelia & I were fishing barefoot so we invited the boys to shed the hiking boots and have a go at fly fishing. It took some coaxing but the younger brother finally stepped up and had a go. Dad kept asking us if we were sure we were ok sharing, sure that we didn’t mind the time interruption. Really, we were going to catch a ton of fish, that was a given. Why not share with others? So, eventually, over the next hour, we had the 2 boys and dad barefoot in the water, catching cutts. It was great to hear dad tell me that the whole event was going to cost him hundreds of dollars in fly fishing gear, but you know what? Perfect! The boys were really into it and loved the hike. If they can fly fish, hike, and enjoy time all together – perfect.

When dad decided to give the rods back to us – despite our assurances we were totally fine with sharing – they started the hike out. But, there was this Darryn fellow that I know likes to fly fish. I simply handed him my rod and made sure he knew I was ok with him using it and simply to return it when done. Again, Amelia had her rod, I had a camera. We’d be busy enough. We opted to walk 100m to the mossy bend and left him the rod. I suspect we might have surprised some people with simply giving of our time and fly rods, but in that setting, on that day, why not? The result for us was already in hand – I had hoped to get photos, to enjoy a day with Amelia, and land a fish. We’d get more fish, of that I was 100% positive. And from what we could tell, Darryn, his wife, and Rocky all had some fun with a fly rod.

It’s amazing how 2 fly rods kept 8 people and a yellow lab so happy.

Why not share?

As I wrote in an earlier blog post last week, there are times when we need to get past ourselves, to fill our needs, to get away to fill our personal needs prior to being with others. That’s healthy. Each of us has our own point of need. That’s fair. But, though it was our day off of guiding and hosting, we took the time to share. Why? Well... perspective. We were going to catch 1 – 200 trout with 2 rods and that kind of fishing. So? Do you need to? I haven’t counted my catch, save one 10km reach of the Ram R for a decade and have no plans to again any time soon. The photos and videos worked out well and there were people that were curious and enjoying their day.

I think to spots of combat fishing on the Bow R – the internet attitude of “get out of my way”, “he did this or that wrong”, and I wonder – if we simply shared and honored each other, what would happen then?

For anyone wondering: surprisingly, the lake has fared well. The camp sites are used and kept clean by users. People haven’t beaten the moss badly at all. We went barefoot around the perimeter to ensure we didn’t rip it up. We were extremely happy with just how nicely the lake has fared the past decade. And given the eagerness of the little cutts and the fact that we had the only fly rods of the 20+ people that came and went throughout the day, it’s clearly not heavily fished.

I also think to our trips to New Zealand. Would we be so forgiving with fish and water on our vacation where so few fish and such explorative, intimate moments are found? Amelia & I have given way plenty of times to honor those we fish with. We’ve actually discussed it a lot – all it takes is one fish a day engaged or a good day once every few days to fill our personal need. The photos and videos are of more interest in New Zealand, typically.

As I wrote at the outset, there was a time when I would have to catch every fish, plan to fish waters that nobody else will fish or plan to stay ahead of others – in order I could catch as many as possible. Sharing would happen but only after filling my need. This is why I can so readily see this same trait in some others I've fished with. Catching fish is still somewhat important, but my personal need is very much different now. I / we still find as out of the way trout waters as possible, but we do it because we have an intimate waters need – to explore nooks and crannies where fish may or may not be and not because we have to catch a ton of fish. That’s what drives our New Zealand trips: hiking 10 – 30km in a day to explore what’s there. We know that a good day once in a while and an encounter with a good trout is going to happen, and that suffices our personal needs. With our skill, sure, we'll get a take from 95% of the fish we encounter but by no means is conquering every fish the impetus. There's a massive difference between having to fish all the time, to catch every fish and not being fulfilled - versus fishing to explore, share, and enjoy for its own sake and deriving fulfilment there, regardless of result.

Of course, there again is a difference in sharing just because and sharing to fill a personal need for attention, for self fulfillment in any way. It's painfully obvious, those who give in order to get attention. It's not a negative, in the end, but it can dampen the experience for the person on the receiving end if the other is sharing based on a need - in the end it's all about them and their needs, not anything to do with the receiver, which is unfortunate.

The one caveat to this discussion is what kills my desire to share: people who take it for granted or show little to no gratitude. That, right there is my personal line. If we fish often with someone who simply fails to thank us or simply takes us for granted, future trips are non starters. I try to be gracious in the moment but future encounters are certainly limited. If there is mutual thanks and appreciation, wonderful - it's about the relationship. But if someone is simply out to use for their personal gain, it is very difficult to continue sharing. As Amelia says, I’m quite cut & dry on that. Quite simple psychology in that. And it’s not hard to identify those who have such an angle – and easy to hold back sharing. It’s typically those who simply enjoy life outdoors and aren’t selfishly obsessed with fly fishing that are more a joy to share with than those who want to tell you how everything in fly fishing ‘is’, and tell you / teach you all about it. It’s just fishing, folks. Enjoy it. Share it with others who could be enriched by it. Obviously, we're not perfect people and have our own shortcomings, but even in something so simple as sharing a fly rod, we can be a small part of enriching others' lives. Hopefully we can all explore this a little more with no self fulfilling need for anything in return.